#932: ‘Maxine’ – Cosmo Jarvis

I don’t know much about writing songs about loving someone, but I feel like if you were to write a song about stalking the one you love, while talking about your consumption of pornography, you might not exactly reach the goal you’re hoping to. Unless of course you are Cosmo Jarvis, in which case it will turn out to be an endearing and catchy pop hit.

Cosmo Jarvis appeared on the radar of most music fans back in 2012 when his track ‘Gay Pirates‘ started gaining some pretty strong rotation. With a publicity boost given to the track by the great Stephen Fry, music lovers everywhere started getting into the bittersweet love song that Jarvis had written.

However, about 3 years prior, he had released his first record, an ambitious double record titled Humasyouhitch/Sonofabitch. The record was close to 90 minutes long and, despite being a debut record, was filled with pop/rock gems that many established musicians would be jealous of. Personally, the record’s first half remains one of my all-time favourite listens, and is filled with some of the greatest self-conscious and self-deprecating lyrics you could find anywhere.

One of the highlights from the first half comes by way of the track ‘Maxine’. In it, Jarvis is effectively professing his love of the titular Maxine, but admitting that he’s a little bit on the messed up side. His ideas of what may be flattering to a member of the opposite sex are somewhat skewed, and in fact, what he finds endearing and sweet, anyone in their right mind would find downright creepy.

While many may relate to this in terms of their cringe-worthy past behaviors, many may relate to this in terms of what they’ve seen prospective partners do for them. If anything though, we have to applaud Jarvis for his ability to be so open about his sexual shortcomings and past behaviour. That is, of course, assuming that this track is indeed autobiographical, but considering some of the other topics he writes about, that wouldn’t come as a surprise.

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